My coming to faith did not start with a leap but rather a series of staggers from what seemed like one safe place to another. Like lily pads, round and green, these places summoned and then held me up while i grew. Each prepared me for the next leaf on which i would land, and in this way i moved across the swamp of doubt and fear.
You know, vik, you’re amazingly human at times. (alix) i know. but i wonder if the feelings i have are real or just electrical stimulations in my cortex that simulate human emotion. i wish i knew if they were real or imagined. (vik) and that makes you completely human, sweetie. we all have those doubts. (alix)
You have tremendous gifts to give; god sent them with you when you came to this earth. and while you might forget them, or doubt they exist, god does not forget and he will show them to you. as soon as your gifts are dedicated to his work, they will blossom. chains that might have held you back for years will dissolve. and you will feel free. you will learn that your spirit is bigger than your circumstances, as soon as you put your spirit first.
I can't help comparing what i have with gale to what i'm pretending to have with peeta. how i never question gale's motives while i do nothing but doubt the latter's. it's not a fair comparison really. gale and i were thrown together by a mutual need to survive. peeta and i know the other's survival means our own death. how do you sidestep that?